When transgender individuals come to realize who they are, they are face with the decision to accept it and live the way they feel inside or keep it undercover and live their womanhood in a cloak of secrecy. The latter of the two choices is low risk because your life can stay normal. Yet that choice to hide it is less satisfying. It like being in love with someone that you cannot date publicly, so you sneak and hide. Some time you want to hold that person and be proud of the love but you settle for tidbit of time yet your heart never is really fulfilled because this is not how you want it to be. That choice is not the choice I want to talk about though. The choice to accept and live life the way you feel is the hard choice. There is very high risk but this choice is more satisfying than any normal person can imagine. The honest truth is that you will lose some friendships and family bonds. Some will just change but not end. Some will severe all together. You may lose your job. There may be taunting, stares, and uncomfortable moments in public in your early stages of transition. With all that could happen, you still will be living the way you feel is right for you. As time goes on, you will progress. Those risks grow far and few in between.
After breaking the social chains, you have come to grips with what you are actually inheriting with your new gender. I call this the transgender inheritance. As a Caucasian FTM(female-to-male), you would be inheriting a position power. The silent (sometime not so silent) inferiority of your previous womanly being is gone. Your life does revolve around shopping, homely duties or some white picket fenced fantasy. Now, as white man, you walk in a room and you are not expected to submit and be lady-like. You are expected to show your strength amongst the other men because socially you are now top dog, not the helpmate. That is empowering right? YES. Now let’s talk about me. The Opposite. I am an African-American MtF(male-to-female). What do I inherit in becoming a Black woman? The legacy of being queen mother of the earth then exploited, raped, and abandoned throughout history. I inherit the deep-rooted negative self image as it pertain to features, hair and body shape, an imbalanced family unit, and a plethora of negative stereotypes. Sounds dismal, right? One more thing that I have inherited is the torch of survivors. I am proud of that inheritance.
I wanted to point this inheritance out because it shows how important it is for us to shed those boxes we have for other people when we shed out our own boxes. Transgendered people should be the shining example of self love and acceptance. We cannot be hypocrites that continue this human legacy of division based on race and gender. We have to be the change that we expect from others.
Despite the typing mistakes (Which are better fixed because a few times you leave out your negatives like “not” etc. would cause someone who wants to disagree with you anyway not even read the whole thing) I was very touched by your statements.
I am not LGBT at all, but I support the community and I support people like you, Diamond, who understand that it’s not about the rest of the world and that YOU are ther primary factor in YOUR life and living in a role that you weren’t born to play is not fair.
I would love it if you’d continue writing.
Yes grammar is not my strong point but i am working on it. Over time Im sure I will get better….thank for the constructive criticism and positive feed back.
As I’ve stated often…transpeople have to be better human beings than our oppressors.
Yes and we have to focus of the fact that we live under the mask….while othe rhide we are open and be ourselves…that is a blessing in it self